Friday, September 10, 2010

Local Weirdo Announces Plan To Crap on Rig Veda

A local weirdo and all around hateful bastard stunned the world with his plans to defecate on a paperback, English translation of the ancient religious manuscript known as the Rig Veda.  We now go live to the scene, somewhere in the American South where such people seem to thrive in the warm, damp conditions, often huddling in darkened corners. 

Thank you Steve. Known to a few as ‘Reverend’, to a some as “that freak down the street,” and to most as “who?” and/or “why?”, this man has single-handedly shaken the fruit tree of global politics with a single message: “I am completely out of my fucking mind and will do anything to have people look at me.”

Passions are now ablaze all across the world as this man, of whom no one has ever heard before but now speaks for not only America but all of Christendom—mainly because the news media have nothing better to do than point a camera at the most noxious imbeciles that inhabit the biosphere—as the entire world seems to watch this man because nothing else is on till the next episode of Madmen.

Hark! He speaks! Let us all listen:

“I am going to shit on your god Indra for destroying the New York City with a lightning bolt.  No one screws with America and gets away with it—no one! Not even the King of the Gods!”

Well there you have it.  The world may or may not be destroyed by the rage of the Indra, King of the Gods.  We can only wait and see and take pictures of this loon.  Back to you in the studio.

Thank you Steve for that report. Up next--the man who loves dancing with cats.

No comments:

Post a Comment