Wednesday, September 30, 2015


And still another day without a single mention of Climate Interactive's latest study from National Republican Radio which was on the front page of New york times just yesterday, while playing chin music from the usual suspects about the big bad deficit which is going to kill us all, even as our planet continues to plunge headlong into catastrophe. But please, give airtime to and about trumpy--after all, unlike the rest of the GOP, he's not just 100% full of it, he's 1 million % full of it--he's a neutron star in a crock bucket--so of course attention must be paid, while continuing the media shut out of Bernie Sanders' campaign. But please, another Berghdazibola-server-gate story, it's clearly about all you right-wing hacks (mostly) at NPR can do. How dare you people pretend to serve the public interest. you're either disingenuous dissemblers or cowards posing as journalists. At least a president trump would put an end to this useless charade called 'NPR'. No, I take that back:NPR employees would knock each other over in a mad rush to serve as his propagandist-in-chief, while no doubt denouncing colleagues who stepped out of line (the latter suddenly disappearing, then reappearing in Gitmo Orange (it's the new autumn color for 2016 if the GOP wins big, cross your fingers NPR, your days of peonage may soon be over, and the lucky winner shall be Peon-in-Charge-of-Other-Peons.)

And still another day without a single mention of Climate Interactive's latest study from National Republican Radio...
Posted by Shaun Gates on Tuesday, September 29, 2015


Obviously the company is getting its money's worth from these brilliant execs--the whole floating turd that is Blackberrry would have Titanic'd to the bottom by now if not for these (most likely under-compensated) men. We can only pray that once it does sink (which will be through no fault of their own, mind you) that they will still have wealthy friends and acquaintances on the boards of other corporations which desperately require their services. Please god give them all solid gold parachutes! (Or life boats/life-yachts, in this case.)

""Blackberry’s newest phone, the Priv, runs Android. That’s an unusual move for Blackberry; so unusual, in fact, that it’s confused poor CEO John Chen, who completely blew this exclusive first look at the Priv.

Highlights from the video — published by Business News Network — include Chen telling the interviewer how the phone “runs Google”, saying with a straight face that “everyone loves BB10”, and then getting lost trying to open Chrome. Oh, and apparently Priv stands for either privacy or privilege, whichever will get you to buy a Blackberry.

It’s not news that Blackberry’s execs are a little out of touch with reality, but this is an excellent three-minute reminder of quite how far the company has fallen."

Sunday, September 27, 2015

the baffling de-synchronization and astonishingly surreal resurrection of charlie kaufman's thesaurus

the baffling de-synchronization and astonishingly surreal resurrection of charlie kaufman's thesaurus

He will amaze you! Astound you! Enter one and all the absurd circus of Charlie Kaufman and [let me check my thesaurus] stare in stupefaction at the depressingly unpleasant funhouse that will be the latest in the line of critically acclaimed dreariness! Doesn't that sound terrific? Cough up $15.00 USD (add in your companion and popcorn with a diet Coke and you've just spent $50.00 bucks to be mildly bemused or severely oppressed  by the imagination of a man whose mind is nearly as delightful as watching the ticking gears of a Swiss watch which has a Punch & Judy show going on inside of it. So if that's your idea of a good time, drop everything and head to the theater.)

I think Kaufman is bizarrely over-rated for reasons I can't begin to fathom. (Note: Pitch this idea to Charley Kaufman as a movie. Should somehow involve Kaufman being in the movie but played by a Kabuki puppet--and who can only communicate in High Elvish. Or maybe Old Saxon. The entire past of the universe is acted out with papier-mâché, and then into the future, which is represented as finger shadows on a map of Mercator projection map of planet earth. As Pangaea reforms eons hence, Kabuki Kaufman realizes he still does not know how to flirt with that waitress at the diner, but she's been dead for eons so he's not even sure why he still cares. Then the sun novas and wipes out all life on the planet. Fade to black. Now sit back and watch the accolades pour in.)

But if you like his movies well okay whatever.


Sunday, September 13, 2015

So far, So Far, So Far...

Voiceover: "And now it's time to celebrate with the smooth, relaxing flavor of Virginia Slims. It's almost the 70's so...

Posted by Shaun Gates on Sunday, September 13, 2015

Feel That Bern, Continued


Posted by Shaun Gates on Sunday, September 13, 2015
#feelthebern, #berniesanders

The Privileged Poor Versus The Not-So-Privileged Poor: Quelle Difference?

What is the difference between private-prep-school attending students versus the not-so-private? I'm not entirely certain, but I suspect, 'learning to be an expert social-climbing licker-of-asses' could account for well over 50% of the variance.

As a sociologist, I study this new diversity at elite colleges. I call lower-income undergraduates who graduated from private high schools the privileged poor. Although they receive excellent educations, my research shows that their ability to navigate the informal social rules that govern elite college life is what really gives them advantages relative to their lower-income peers who did not attend elite high schools, those whom I call the doubly disadvantaged. Although also academically gifted and driven, they enter college with less exposure to the unsaid expectations of elite academic settings. They adjust, but acclimating to the social side of academic life takes time, potentially limiting their access to institutional resources and social networks. Naturally, this framework does not encompass every student, but it does help to explain why students from similarly disadvantaged backgrounds navigate the same college so differently (

I'm fairly certain that this is a completely new phenomenon never mentioned before in science or literature, as poverty was invented by Franklin Delano Roosevelt as part of the New Deal he made with the race of lizard-aliens who crash landed near the South Pole (probably around the onset of teh Bronze Age) and have been living in giant caverns under the Antarctic ice ever since. (And that is why we rarely see them, before you ask, so shut your damn yapper and stop asking questions with obvious answers.)

Evidence? Evidence, you say? Pah! There was a documentary about them! However, it had to be marketed as 'fiction', because the truth would have been too much to handle. Just imagine them, sitting there, the naive, silly souls, mindlessly munching on buttered popcorn with all the intelligence of a cow chewing on regurgitated grass for 12 hours per day--then suddenly discovering that the world is not as they believed! That they have been lied to their entire lives! Everything they had ever been taught was a lie taught by deluded liars! And then what would have happened? That's right! Would have blown their fucking minds!

 We can only imagine but there is no doubt in my mind that an immediate mass hysteria would have broken out, children crying for no reason, women throwing away their shoes, shooting massacres caused by men dressed as comic, mobs engaging in cannibalism, men in black dancing with men in white (don't ask don't tell, as we used to say), unfortunates being devoured alive, the lucky ones dying quickly with heads and spines ripped straight out of their bodies with the incredible strength of [viking thing, super aggressive bx ?], fortunate enough to only experience one second of horrible horrible pain--seen in the horror of their eyes by the beserk-ed ones, much to their glee--smashed skulls  and brains eaten or even put in blended and juiced and then mixed with highly distilled aged liquors and unmentionable horrors! Which for obvious reasons I won't mention here.

Eventually this town will get a lot quieter and there will be much less traffic, though.

#education, #LickingAss

Thursday, September 10, 2015

Hero Pilot To Public: "Fuck It"

"Fuck it." As a reward for his display of professional skill and bravery, his pension was clawed back and deposited into...
Posted by Shaun Gates on Thursday, September 10, 2015

Sunday, September 6, 2015

The Subject Was How Much Better My Family Is Than Yours

by Frankish Hairy Bruin

The Subject Was How Much Better My Family Is Than Yours

Well, here we are again, America. Evidently David Brooks is nearly dying of something so they editorial board felt forced to appoint another useless vapor cloud. In this case, me, Frankish Hairy Bruin, one who seems to have been feeding from a silver-lined trough for so long that I can't accept that my one real qualification for this job is being shot out of my mother's baby cannon with a "trust fund baby" tattoo.

But if biology is destiny, then surely I deserve to be here. Or maybe I just sucked the right sausage at the right time, who knows? It's clearly not because I am wise,
 or clever, or have anything worthwhile or interesting to say. Let's face it: A braying mule could probably get a job at the Times these days, as long as it would say hate unions, the minimum wage, and Hillary while shoving caviar into his fat gob in a restaurant staffed by underpaid migrant labor.  

I mean, can you believe my fucking egocentricity? I actually live in a mental world where I believe that most people can 'connect' with their families in a summer beach house? Am I actually completely fucking blind? Can I not see the misery and suffering of the homeless, the poverty, the desperation? Or am I just a sociopath who just plain doesn't give a shit about anything except what I'm going through. Expect on memoir in the near future about me dealing with the death of one or both of my parents--hey, it might even make the New York Times best-seller list. 


Penny Dreadful Season Two: Now With More Butt Fucking!

The fans asked for it and we're giving it! You said, "More buggery and butt fucking!" And that is what we gave you. Who knows, maybe next season Eva will get her tits out again but don't hold your breath on that one. The price of those nipples has risen astronomically ever since she was a Bond Girl.