Friday, July 31, 2015

Most Popular High School Plays & Musicals -- You Won't Believe The Answer

Most Popular High School Plays & Musicals -- You Won't Believe The Answer!


It's that perennial favorite of the young and old, The ThreePenny Opera!
Yup, even we where surprised by that but it's true! 
#believeitordie


NPR boldly neglects to mention that workers are underpaid once more, gives free advertising for business lobbyists

NPR boldly neglects to mention that workers are underpaid once more, gives free advertising for business lobbyists
Above: Disgruntled lazy working class refusing to budge.
Yes, National Public Radio, the radio which is produced by and for the public interest, is willing to stand up to the working class and refusing (once more) to mention that horrible jobs are also horribly under-compensated, while boldly and bravely providing free advertising for a business lobby. The insinuation that working-class Americans are probably lazy and that is why they are under-paid and/or under-employed and/or disabled is, of course, just background radiation at NPR and was not specifically mentioned in this story: That job was left to the comments of the paid shills and pensioners on the web page.

Thursday, July 23, 2015

TEST OF THE EMERGENCY BLOGGING SYSTEM

THIS IS A TEST OF THE EMERGENCY BLOGGING SYSTEM. 
IN THE EVENT OF A REAL EMERGENCY, KEEP STARING AT THIS BLOG FOR FURTHER INFORMATION

DO NOT LET ANYONE STORE CORPSES IN YOUR BASEMENT

WE CANNOT STRESS THAT LAST ONE ENOUGH 

EVERYONE SEEM TO MAKE THAT MISTAKE GOD KNOWS WHY

Thursday, July 16, 2015

Nostalgia Corner

Apparently, it might be that all dinosaurs had feathers, just as all mammals have hair.
But what really matters is, why doesn't anyone remember this dance craze?



Thursday, July 9, 2015

bees teach us critical thinking via collaborative murder

how bees teach us collaborative, critical thinking via collaborative murder 
-from the magical balloon ride of mister brooks

Hey peeps, gotta' pop in here to earn my paycheck which I get in order to prove the maxim, 95% of everything is shit because that's what people like.

So you know the drill:

First paragraph: Me all excited about some bullshit!  We all know that bees are social animals, right. Just like people! But you say, "David, bees are stupid!" Wrong. You're stupid. I mean, you're reading this column and taking it seriously, right? Okay, let's move on.

Second paragraph: Did you know how aforesaid bullshit demonstrates counter-intuitive hypothesis? Bees are not stupid--in fact, they're bee-smart! Take, for example, a fellow walking down a bucolic country road in the spring time. This gent--who let's say, looks a lot like this guy--

hypothetically of course, it's just a photo I plucked from the Internet completely at random, no idea whom he might be--so this gent is strolling down the road and then because his dumb fat stupid head is filled with 'ideas' that are different from mine, he doesn't even notice that hive of Africanized bees living in that mailbox. Whoops! Out come a hive of bees hahahaha! That's right, stab that old bastard!

Now poor ole'   ̶p̶a̶u̶l̶ ̶k̶r̶u̶g̶m̶a̶n̶ random stranger is suddenly being attacked like a Tokyo firebombing in 1944! Who's the dumb fat stupid-head now,  ̶p̶a̶u̶l̶ ̶k̶r̶u̶g̶m̶a̶n̶ random stranger?  That's right, the bees, by working together, have become super-intelligent! And the man is super-dead! Who's the smartie-pants now,  ̶p̶a̶u̶l̶ ̶k̶r̶u̶g̶m̶a̶n̶ random stranger?

Third paragraph: Wrap up my deep penetrating insight into reality which only I possess with message of the moral superiority of keeping your mouth shut and the virtue of blind obedience to our Wall Street Overlords or the boot of whom ever I happen to be licking today. Yes, dear reader, I have examined this matter carefully, very carefully. It consumed an entire 30 minutes of my time between breakfast and lunch, after which I busied myself with a Danielle Steele novel but anyways the point is is that only I have seen this. The bees obey their ruler. For the good of their hive nation, they attack and die. And I'm sure that they die happily, knowing that they gave all for the greater good.

So remember, the next time you or your child or grandchild is out there in some foreign hellhole filled with people who hate America and therefore need to learn about democracy at the end of a rifle barrel, weep not. Instead, say it with me (from a very, very, very, very, very safe distance):

FOR THE HIVE! HIVE AMERICA!







The Drought Is Over! (And Other Things I Learned Today)

Here is a brief list of things you can learn from skimming news of the past week or so:


  • Microsoft is laying off over 20,000 people (still needs to import computer engineers for some reason) (Microsoft layoffs)
  • The drought in California has not been in the news since forever--like at least a week--so it must be over. This is remarkable that it ended in July but there you have it.
  • Apple's streaming music service is going to take us into a bold new future, a brave new world wherein somehow people cannot live without Apple software (unless they can't afford Apple hardware, in which case they are screwed and must eke out their wretched little hardscrabble  lives, simply dreaming of the joy of a gadget on which they can produce a slideshow of their children being shot out of a baby cannon to indie-pop reverb while dutifully calling their mothers and at the same time watching pornography to fill in those awkward moments of silence that come with any conversation between an adult child and parent. (No matter how shit this software is, it's still brilliant! Can you beat that? The New Apple Something What The Fuck Ever
  •  Some criminals are really very bright, I wonder if they need like any help around the office, maybe some light typing and filing? symantec-report-suggests-hackers-motives-are-blurring
  • Marriage will soon be obsolete. Sex Dolls That Talk Back
  • (Hopefully these cyborg partners will be saying things such as, "Love me long time!", rather than, "Do you know what's wrong with you, you conceited bastard?" 

The 1930's Bruning Deflation

Hitler! (And deflation)

"Yes, there was a hyperinflation in 1923, which may have helped radicalize German politics. But the proximate factor in Hitler’s rise to power was the great deflation of the 1930s, brought on by a disastrous attempt to stay on gold (krguman.blogs.nytimes.com, 09july2015). "