Monday, February 22, 2010

An Open Letter To NPR

Dear National Public Radio Weekend Edition: First of all, let me thank you for the in-depth analysis of Tiger Woods' public humiliation*. That was powerful stuff and I really learned a lot of stuff. Apparently, this crazy Tiger Woods fellow seems to think he has some god-given right to privacy. And some people at NPR think this stuff is like really, really important, so important it can take 5-10% of the airtime on a given program. So now I know it's important. I tried to tell you this before, but apparently I used a bad word and my letter was never sent to you, because a computer somewhere says that the word "cock" might be read by someone at NPR, and what if "cock" and "Tiger Woods" were used in the same paragraph? For example: The image of a black man's penis could involuntarily manifest itself in the mind Steve Innskeep, or a female intern, and then someone's head might explode. So thank you for taking the time away from these stupid wars and stupid recessions and stupid corrupt and incompetent elected officials in order to justify our lurid, prurient fascination with the genitalia of the rich and famous. So thank you so very, very much. Yours Truly, DRT *Weekend Edition Saturday, 20-FEB-2010

No comments:

Post a Comment