Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Gov. Mick Huckabee Feels Ghost of Willie Horton Gently Raping Him In The Ass.
Governor Huckabee woke up after realizing he had granted clemency to a man whom several years later shot four police officers, and felt something heavy and warm on top of him. "Yo, remember me?" At first Gov. Huckabee thought is was the ghost of Barry White or Black Father Christmas, but the ghost then identified himself as once having been Willie Horton. "That's right--I fucked with Dukakis and now it's a must that I fuck with you." After enduring a long and unpleasant bout of nonconsensual homosexuality, the ghost grabbed a Coors out of the fridge, saying "Don't worry, I'll be back in 2012." The governor felt relieved until he saw a line of reporters going out the door, ready to do the exact same thing. "Well, hop on," he said with his usual optimism, "we may as well get this thing over with."