Monday, January 17, 2011

Judge Not The Human Palin, Lest Ye Be Judged

by Professor
O. Rang Tang
Generally it is best for apes not to overly concern themselves with the affairs of human.  However, it is interesting to examine them in the spirit of detachment paired with curiosity.  (After all, perhaps by observing the lower species, we might even learn a bit more about apes.  I know some find this attitude shocking--to think we could learn from studying humans--but perhaps we can.)

Take, for example, the  shrieking and howling in regards to the human known as 'Palin'.  It's gotten so bad that sometimes those humans keep me up at night!  Anyway.

Evidently this Palin human is both renowned and reviled in their circles.  For example, the human known as 'ROSS' complains that Palin is an embarrassing idiot, and wonders why other humans keep watching her.  How typical of the human!

Why do humans watch anything?  They'll watch another human juggle coconuts or bananas--a bit in the manner that we might watch a play by Monkey Shakespeare.  It's almost ape-like (Yes, it's heretical to some, but still we should consider the possibility).

Then the human 'ROSS', while seeking attention from the other humans, complains about humans paying attention to other humans! Absurd, certainly, and showing the limited intelligence of the human.  However, some among us will be delighted to discover that this Douthat, as he also calls himself, worships our Monkey Jesus.  Why?  We don't know, but I do know that he asks the other humans not to judge their fellow human, Palin, as Monkey Jesus asks us to do.  (Although in doing so he is in fact judging the judgement of his fellow humans...I know, absurd, but we are discussing humans here, so bear with me.)

I suppose the lesson here is that humans like to do silly things, such as stand up and call attention to themselves and then ask their fellow humans not to pay attention to other humans.  And, it should be added, pass judgement on other humans...and then tell other humans not to judge other humans!

Does this behavior shed any light on ape behavior? Probably not--for after all, were we not given the ability for rational thought and comprehension by Monkey Jesus?  Most likely it is simply, as my colleague Professor Bonobo Sartre once said--Bananas!

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