Our Great Nation is in a crisis: We do not know enough about Tiger Woods' cock. Where has it been? What has it done? Why did it do what it did? And just as importantly: How?
Until America has the answers to these questions, we cannot rest, we cannot relax, we cannot regurgitate, we cannot perform any other activities which begin with the letter 'r'.
Imagine if we had simply ignored Watergate? Nixon would never have been re-elected. Therefore we must struggle on, turning over evey dark stone and revealing the horrid putridness beneath it to the cleansing light above. And the best way to do this is to put a camera on the cock.
(Preferably a streaming web cam, so the entire world can see exactly where a black man's cock is at all times. No, that's not gay at all, it's perfectly reasonable and it's justice. How will our white women be safe from black cocks otherwise?)
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